At some point today, I need to find time to take a shower.
At some point today, I need to get a teen and a toddler up and ready to run errands that they will both hate, with the exception of bribery lunch.
At some point today, I need to find out what that smell is in the van.
At some point today, I need to make my appointment at the Apple Bar and try to convince whomever has the pleasure of serving me that my MacBook can be fixed, and the fact that my toddler spilled apple juice all over it before it mysteriously went kaput shouldn’t be a bid deal…In reality, it was rum and diet coke…. mine, not the kids… pretty sure I murdered it by my own clumsy hand.
At some point today, I have to make my way to the castle, beyond goblin city so that we can be protected from the fire breathers. In other words, Downtown Dallas, worst parking lot in the world, navigate the busiest children’s hospital on the planet so the little kid can start allergy shots. How sucky is it to be allergic to fire ants when you live in Texas….How sucky is it for his PARENTS?!
At some point today, I will have to drive an hour home with grumpy children just so I can start thinking about what to cook for dinner and what is the most dire area to clean up so we don’t end up on a bad episode of Hoarders. Pretty sure it will be dishes.
At some point today, my dishwasher will breath a sigh of relief as I ignore a new sink full of dishes and choose to take a walk with my Simon, Captain Neurotic dog, and the Toddler of Doom. We will of course ask the teenager one to go, but he will grunt something in his language while rummaging through the fridge. I will of course point out that we just ate, how could he possibly still be hungry and he will then grunt something in teen-eese. I will, of course, pretend to understand and just walk away. After all, he is 14 and already over 6ft. I assume it takes much fuel to haul himself upstairs to navigate the xbox.
At some point today, we will use a combination of good parenting skills, and Diego/Dora to occupy toddler kid in hopes to spend a few minutes catching up on what earth shattering things we missed on the internetz, possibly do some work, say something clever and snarky on FB, retweet something with cats in it and wonder why we don’t get any work done. At this point, we’ve neglected to tell xbox to “play next episode” and toddler Jude is swan diving onto my head from the table behind the couch. If he is lucky, I will break his fall. If not, he will most likely end up head first onto the floor. I will do my best to break the fall.
At some point today, Simon and I will begin the intense negotiations of bath/bedtime. It will be intense, there will be flooding, tears, many contracts read (mostly Winnie the Pooh and some fishy books), Finally, terms will be met and If we sneak away quietly we can call it a successful negotiation….errr I mean the tired toddler slumbers. Teenager Parker is responsible for his own bedtime negotiations.
At some point today, I will have a huge decision to make. Do I try to catch up on blogging, try to get into the Studio to either clean it or do something creative in it, or do I just go to bed? Judging by the frequency of blogging lately, I am pretty sure you can guess which I will do.
At some point today, I will remember that SuperSimon has a meeting to attend after work and won’t be home until 10 so I am on my own this evening. I have actually just now realized this but am too committed to this lovely day to change my evening plans.
At some point I will realize I never did get that shower.
With exhausted devotion,
Wenders
p.s. I MUST not forget milk and toilet paper at the grocery store. The situation is very dire!
